Saturday, June 22, 2013

Family Religion

Last week I introduced you all to Matthew Henry's book called 'Family Religion'.  I do hope that you were able to secure a copy and have read it.

If not, please avail yourself to a FREE copy.  

This week I was hoping to do a little chat about the book, but it's just not going to happen.  I've got something else to talk about.  So, maybe next weekend for the book.  

Now, if you will, couple this book with the conference that we went to 2 weeks ago.  This brings me to the present: it's time for me get down on the floor and confess some things to you.

1.  We finally started doing FAMILY devotions.  Yep, ALL of us.  

What?  You're just getting to them now?  I thought your family was all good there.  You know, because you talk scripture and God business all the time, you sold off your house to get out of debt, you have all these children, you homeschool.............

Yes, now while all those things are true and good, and it is also true that I have been quite diligent to read the bible to the children, give them devotions, give them bibles, throw in curriculum that was clearly christian etc....   We never did it as a family, and we most certainly never did it in the mornings first thing.  I think we might have attempted it, but you know, if you're an adult doing it under duress it doesn't last more than once or twice and it's all in the bin again.  Don't ask me what we did in the caravan.  It certainly wasn't God business in the sense that you all might suppose.  It was break Deborah business if you really want my thoughts.  I cried nearly EVERY day.  I had to give up my dream home { when we were financially all good to keep it for ever } and become a modern day vagabond - just like Abraham without all the promises.  This current day doesn't find me too bad though, we are in a rented home that has brought PEACE.  That means that no one bothers to give us grief here.  I can't tell you what it does to your health to have your own home but no peace in it, that coupled with sleep deprivation, but that is an additional story, and I don't have all day.  So it's not all bad, I just haven't quite recovered yet.

In regards to FAMILY devotions:  I pretty much just waddled along for the last 20 years without any assistance.  Not even a local church for support, and that was because we left anything that even looked like an institution. So for a long while there I was really, really alone.  Truthfully, I still feel it, but hey, too bad princess, suck it up.

Until now.  The lost loneliness is still my avid and daily companion, and I certainly have no active leadership save God himself and I am on the slightly deaf side.  However, the past 2 weeks we've been diligent to do FAMILY worship.  That is a miracle for us.  Although, to be fair as well, it has NOT been fun.  

The two teenagers don't want to join in the singing.  They don't want to pray.  They don't want to participate at all.  The're body language speaks complete rebellion and contempt.  The fact that we can get them in the same room I suppose is hopeful, but overall I am VERY discouraged.

I still do all the reading.  I like reading so that is good.

I had been waiting 20 years for ALL of us to do a family devotion seriously, and now that we have got here, it's not exactly what I was hoping for.

{ You reap what you sow }

You really do reap what you sow.  Oh, yes you do.  If you don't lay the work early on, it's crap trying to do it like Johnny come lately.  No amount of calling, "fire, fire," has helped anyone in my home.  Apparently they like the heat just fine.  I guess they are just, "trained in the way they should go and now they won't depart from it".  That's how discouraged I am.

There is a little bit of hope, but wow, it is minuscule.  It's only 2 weeks in and it's not like they are completely devoid of any knowledge, it's just their hearts need new tinkering, and they need some dynamite put in there.

Over the years as a woman I have really just taken a backseat { apart from all that reading mostly } while my family continued to fall into the pit of hell - in the sense that I totally rejected becoming the preacher / teacher with authority.  I suppose I could have done it, but I really wanted to try out this Titus woman business.  What line could I cross, what line could I not cross.  I really feel that my boys are too old for me to teach them doctrine.  I am desperate to quit them homeschooling too.   It is NOT for me to lead them into MANHOOD { I don't believe women should be teaching doctrine to grown males or growing MEN }  I have offered guidance, correction, and encouragement as all mothers would, but I also wanted to be careful about not crossing the spiritual line where I was usurping God given roles.  I didn't want to be a man dressed in a skirt.  So I allowed my shift to move over to the little girls and the boys just sat strangling themselves on the world of video games in their quiet time.

Now on top of dealing with getting the children on board - I do have to tell you that the girls are all good with it.  They LOVE the singing.  About myself: I still have to re-wire MYSELF.  From all the years where we didn't do the singing and first thing in the morning business.   I have to re-train myself with a new HABIT.  I have to meet the others half way with what they want to sing.  I have to TRY and sit back a bit more and encourage the males to take their place.  You know, and not run the show like I've done for the last 20 years - hubby is finally in attendance and that changes the dynamic quite a bit.  It is very hard when they are completely abdicated though.  They think that ignorance excuses them.  Well, ok, hubby is taking the praying serious, so that is a very good start.  Here's a hint for any man game enough to read my post today:  if you don't know what you are doing, just copy a successful man that IS doing it.  Just ring up a man who you think has it, and ask him what he's doing, and copy him.  Maybe that's too much like a man asking for directions when he's lost.  Ok, never mind, just copy him from afar then.

Lacking vision.  My children are not entirely ignorant of God and his word, but they aren't on fire for him either.  For the most part they 
do NOT have a vision for their life in any shape or form.  We are still trying to piece out a map for the boys.  Don't you love coming in late and having to clean up messes?  All we have on their maps at the moment is to get a full time job, and get a car.  Great CHRISTIAN parents we are, not.  There is NO map for the spiritual life though, so all that worldly stuff is going to wreck them.  Ok, I suppose the immediate map / trail on the map is to get them to come with willing hearts to the family devotion table.  If they can't do that, how will they ever do it for their own families?  That's a good first destination.  There probably is a bigger map, but it's mostly invisible and we don't have the eyesight to bring it to light just yet.  

So on that account I was very happy to have attended the conference 2 weeks ago.  { I was also very happy to have read the book 'Family Religion'. }   It has been good for me to link in with the visionary stuff that Kevin Swanson, Scott Brown, Doug Philips, and their friends have been sharing with other christians.  They think rather like minded to myself, just more articulated and fleshed out better.  But, hey, it's the fruit that matters.  They have it, I'm still trying to find it.


  1. Ten to one if you investigated thoroughly Swanson & co don't have it all together either. There is a huge gap between ideology & practice ~ which I know all about because I am the Queen of ideology. Practice? What's that?

    Secondly, God is in the business of families. Ask Him for a verse for your family/sons/daughters then stand in faith by that word. That is His promise to you.

    I have several ~ & with 5 kids, believe you me, I need them all: My word will not depart from your house;

    And all thy children shall be taught of the LORD; and great shall be the peace of thy children.

    There is:
    I will fight your enemies,
    and I will save your children.

    Lift up your eyes and look around; all your children gather and come to you. As surely as I live," declares the LORD, "you will wear them all as ornaments; you will put them on, like a bride.
    "Look and see, for everyone is coming home! Your sons are coming from distant lands; your little daughters will be carried home.

    Plenty more. When God has a particular verse to impart to you the context is often irrelevant. I am seeing His promise to us being fulfilled as one by one He sets my children's hearts on fire for Him & brings them into the kingdom! Hold fast. Even more than you our gracious Lord & saviour does not want to see your children perish.

  2. Hello Deborah,
    It's great that you've started family worship! Don't get discouraged, that's what the enemy wants! I'm sure Kevin Swanson doesn't have it all together and I'd be a fool to think they do. Keep it up! And pray for your young men. That God would make them more hungry for His word. And as for video games, All video games are banned in our house. We used to have quite a few, but after listening to Douglas Phillips explain why he thinks men and men in training should not have video games, we thought that was a good enough reason. Pitch them all. Except one, lol. I allowed the wii because it demands physical excersize. That and we hardly ever touch it anyway. And even if we did they wouldn't be allowed access until they put in a full days hard work.

  3. Thank you ladies for your encouragement and advice. Most appreciated.

    I'll see what I can do. :o)

  4. Sorry missed your post last week so I have only just downloaded the book now.

    Keep up with the family devotions, Dont let the devil fool you into thinking it is not working.


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